Hi guys! I hope all has been well and that everyone started off 2017 with a positive note! Work has been busy before I flew off for my first vacation in a long while and it’s been a quite some time since I’ve put up an entry – but I’m back! I’m on a plane back to Singapore from Korea as I draft this entry, but before I pen down my thoughts on how 2016 has been, I can’t emphasize enough how much I absolutely hate turbulence and plane rides. This entry is going to be yet another personal entry, and I hope you guys enjoy it as much as the previous entries. I’ll continue with the technical entries and case studies soon once I settle into my routine again.
2016 has been an amazing year for me, and I hope it has been for everyone else as well. If 2016 was challenging for you, I hope the holiday season was able to lift your spirits, and that 2017 will be a better year. Hang in there and don’t give up, and remember that your life is and will never be bound by your 八字 chart. I always remind my clients that our ancestors wouldn’t spend so much time developing 八字 if there wasn’t a way to change things. If you happen to be a new visitor who stumbled upon my website thanks to the power of Google, don’t forget to check out some of the material I’ve always been recommending: 1) 了凡四训 2) Enneagram and 3) The Power of Now by Eckhart Toelle. I would recommend the above three sources as a means to kick-start your efforts into transcending your chart and making everything better. Keep fighting, and know that you’re not alone.
As most of my regular readers and clients have found out by now, I’m born in the year of the Tiger (1986). 2016 was meant to be a year where there would be a lot of changes because of this phenomenon we commonly know as 犯太岁。To recap what I’ve put I’ve mentioned in on of my earlier posts – 犯太岁 is not necessary a bad thing per se. The word 犯 has a negative connotation of course, but ultimately 犯太岁 is not in itself a bad thing. One would have to look at the entire 八字 chart to determine how a particular year would be. I usually regard a 犯太岁 year as a year of change, and change can be good sometimes albeit tiring. My chart belongs to a 庚 Daymaster chart and I have a weak Daymaster, so technically 2016 is supposed to be a good year for me as is it 丙申 year where my Daymaster is strengthened (申 is 庚’s 禄位), taking into account that my 大运 is alright and does not clash with my 流年 Pillar. This year has indeed been one filled with changes, whereby I changed jobs twice – not that I like or encourage job-hopping, just that circumstances called for me to make a decision for the betterment of my life and career trajectory. I’m grateful that everything worked out in the end and that 2016 ended really well for me – I managed to get the career progression I wanted; my metaphysics consulting sideline is growing; and I found the love of my life. I’ve never been happier with the current state of my life.
Both my 紫微斗数 and 八字 chart has mentioned that I’m supposed to have a really good and blissful marriage, and that my partner would be a great support to me. I think I’ve finally found her. I’d like to think of it as Heaven’s way of making it up to me, which is perhaps why I had to go through what I did in order to learn to become a good husband and father to deserve someone like her. If you’re wondering how it showed up in the charts – it’s basically 天府星 landing in my 夫妻宫 with no 煞星s involved at all, and 乙木正财, which represents my wife, basically combining with my weak 庚 Metal Daymaster to further strengthen Metal.
Some of you may have read that I come from a home where there wasn’t any warmth or love, and throughout my life I never really quite knew how it felt to be in the receiving end of affections. I never thought I’d one day find someone who would love me the way my partner does, and I can’t put in words how much of a positive impact my partner has on me. My hardened shell has come off, and I’m a lot happier and ‘lighter’ and I’m feeling more like my old self again before I had to go through all the challenges that turned me into someone I didn’t really like. And yes, you guys guessed it – I did look at her chart and she does 旺夫, but truth be told, when we both fell in love, my knowledge in metaphysics had no part to play in it and everything just fell into place. Both of us still find it hard to believe we ended up together. Many people have asked me what 旺夫 means exactly – it’s hard to explain precisely what 旺夫 entails or means, but in general, if I had to put it in my own words, this person inspires you to be better and brings out the best in you – which my partner definitely has. As a results, everything in your life suddenly becomes smoother without you realizing it. Our relationship only began in October but I’ve already changed so much and on many occasions was touched to tears by my partner’s words and actions. I may sound really happy on my blog and my pictures are always of me smiling, but few people know that I’ve lead a really lonely life and that on most nights when I went to sleep, I wish I didn’t wake up the next day. My partner made everything I went through worthwhile and she gives meaning to everything that I do and I thought I’d dedicate a paragraph to thank her for an amazing 2016.
If you’re wondering why 2016 is the year I’ve been eagerly waiting for, it’s because 2016 marks the turning point I’ve been waiting for all these years. I read my own chart, and 2016 is supposed to be the year where everything changes and it has. I’ve hit rock bottom in 2013 and started picking myself up in 2014, and I can’t believe the difference two years have made. For my new readers, if you’re wondering what I’m talking about, feel free to read about it here and also here. You may find it odd that someone you don’t know is so open about his background, but personally I find that there is something powerful about being authentic and vulnerable.
The start of the new year is when we think about and reflect on how the previous year went, and it’s been in a while since I’ve been in such a sentimental and introspective mood. The myriad of thoughts going through my head make it hard to pen down everything I wish to express. One thing is for sure – I am very grateful for all my past clients, future clients and readers of my blog. I’ve started this consultation service for about two years now, and I wish to take this opportunity to thank everyone for their support, words of encouragement, appreciation and trust. You have no idea how much your support means to me. It puts a smile on my face each time a client tells me that they’ve benefitted from a consultation, and the journey so far since I’ve embarked on this has been extremely rewarding and fulfilling. Whoever is reading my blog, I really hope you enjoy reading the entries, getting to know Chinese culture a little bit more, getting to know the role of metaphysics in our lives and how it can benefit you, and
also getting to know me especially if someone you would like to engage in future. I promise to always stay genuine and authentic, to do my best to use my knowledge to help everyone get more out of their lives, make better decisions and take care of their healths.
I’ve had more than 300 clients and consultations completed now, all of which were done online. It’s been an incredible journey and, again, I’m grateful for the trust everyone has put in me. I’ve never expected this little side project of mine would eventually take off so well. Perhaps I could take this opportunity to discuss some of the topics and questions that come up most often during my consultations in 2016 and offer my take on certain things. I’ve had the exact same questions and thoughts as all my clients before I became a practitioner and I hope some of my thoughts can serve a reminder to past clients and a guide to future ones:
Can Your Chart Be Changed? Can Our Daymaster Be Strengthened or Balanced?
Our ancestors believed that our lives follows nature’s laws – our disposition, our talents, our growth etc. Your 八字 chart is a representation of that unfolding of nature’s laws. There is no way to artificially change your chart – your chart is fixed and it cannot be change. It describes your life and how it will follow a certain pattern and law of unfolding based on the laws of the natural universe.
Do not fall into the trap of thinking that your 八字 chart determines everything. 八字 only describe the laws of how things will unfold, but it is not life itself nor is it the ultimate determinant of how things should or ought to be. Remember that in 《三命通会》, a chapter was dedicated to discuss the importance of self-cultivation so that one can transcend one’s chart. Nothing is set in stone. I keep saying this and I will say this again – our ancestors will not spend all those centuries developing this art only to tell us that we can’t change anything.
“Does That Mean I Can Never Change Things? Must I Resign To Fate?”
No, no, no! Please DO NOT fall into the trap of feeling that way. As mentioned above, our ancestors would not spend centuries developing this art only to tell us “Hey! Your life is challenging but too bad! There’s nothing you can do about it!” That would be silly of our ancestors. Don’t get me wrong – I’m not saying that you can or should do everything you so desire or whatever that comes to mind. This field is supposed to help you make better decisions and identify blind spots, and with that hopefully it can help one lead a more fulfilling and enriching life.
Having this knowledge has made me aware of my limitations, and in many cases helped me accept some things that I can’t change. Metaphysics is never about using it to fulfil your desires, but to help you develop the self-awareness needed to empower yourself. If I had the knowledge of metaphysics and life experience I have now when I was younger, my life would have been very different. Which brings me to my next point – sometimes, you really need to go through tough times to learn and grow.
“I Feel Like Giving Up. Nothing Seems To Be Going Right.”
I asked myself that a lot of times when I was younger. When I was growing up, I was constantly depressed and I didn’t know why, only to grow up and find out that perhaps it had something to do with my family because I never knew how being loved felt like. My parents claimed that they loved me, which I have no doubts of, but little did they know that the environment they created was extremely toxic and damaging to the developing of a child.
There were many points in my life where I wanted to take my own life due to the feeling of desolation and helplessness. Read my note on my Facebook and you’ll understand. If you’re going through something similar, just know I know how it feels like. I wish I could take it away from you with a snap of my fingers.
Don’t give up. Keep fighting. I’m going to re-iterate my favourite quote by Mencius that if Heavens wanted to give you great responsibility and purpose, Heavens will ‘torture’ you and test your mettle. When you are ready, Heavens will let you know in Its own way your purpose and why you are here, so stay positive. We are meant to go through certain things to help us grow.
《孟子·告子下·生死之论》
「舜發於畎畝之中，傅說舉於版築之閒，膠鬲舉於魚鹽之中，管夷吾舉於士，孫叔敖舉於海，百里奚舉於市。故天將降大任於斯人也，必先苦其心志，勞其筋骨，餓其體膚，空乏其身，行拂亂其所為，所以動心忍性，曾益其所不能。人恆過，然後能改；困於心，衡於慮，而後作；徵於色，發於聲，而後喻。入則無法家拂士，出則無敵國外患者，國恆亡。然後知生於憂患而死於安樂也。」
I mentioned in one of my posts that, I’ve noticed that people with a positive upturn in their Luck Cycles/大运 are always very positive and resilient, whereas those that lean towards cynicism and pessimism tend to not have this in their charts. It got me wondering whether our 八字 chart and lives have a chicken-and-egg relationship – which determines which? You decide.“I Don’t Know What I Want To Do With My Life. What Should I Do?”
Trust me – most people don’t know what to do with their lives, so don’t feel like you’re the only person. I think it’s totally fine to feel lost once in a while. I’ve had many such moments. Life offers us endless possibilities and we have the freedom to make whatever we wish out of our lives, so being lost is only normal because it presents to us so many options. Societal expectations give the state of being ‘lost’ a negative connotation and gives people pressure, but ultimately what I’m trying to say is, don’t be so hard on yourself. Most people don’t have a guide and everyone’s still figuring things out for themselves.
One of the biggest things I’ve learned is that, sometimes, you just need to learn to be in the present. It’s good to have goals of course, but don’t forget to be in the present (and hopefully enjoy it). This whole topic on spirituality and positive thinking is going to take ages to explain – go read the book “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Toelle and you’ll get what I’m trying to say. Please go and read it! If you can understand what the author is trying to say, you will never need a consultation from anyone, ever! I made an attempt to explain what the book was trying to say here in case you’re interested.
Most of my clients end up spending their energies worrying instead of channeling towards positive change. Personally, I feel that creating positive change requires a really calm mind first, and the prerequisite for that is knowng how to be in the present. Try exploring what ‘be in the present moment’ means to you and see what insights you develop.
I learned to ‘enjoy’ the present the hard way, but it was worth it. The joy of express in writing. The satisfaction of acquiring new knowledge. The taste of food provided by mother nature that nourishes your body. The bliss of setting your eyes on someone you love. Relish every single moment of it and slowly you will find that you’ve changed as a person as you explore the depth of that experience. Personally, for me, being in the present also means enjoying your own company. When I started to become comfortable being on my own and enjoying solitude, the way I saw things changed drastically and it gave me more confidence and, more importantly, clarity in pursuing what I wanted while ignoring the naysayers – which brings me to my next point.
There Will Be People Who Will Want To Bring You Down Or Get In Your Way
There can be many reasons why people like this appear in your life. Trust me when I say I speak from experience and I know how it feels when people absolutely do not believe in you, put you down and go to the extent of sabotaging you. If you know the kind of background I came from, you will know who and what I’m referring to. I wish you all could see the extent of it. From my experience, it’s really due to their own issues or some deep seated insecurity that they have. These people could be someone who simply likes to jump to conclusions before even trying to get to know you or putting themselves in your shoes, or they could just be downright vile, vindictive and malicious, going out of their way to harm you. If this ever happens to you, just remind yourself that perhaps they are having some issues of their own that they don’t know how to deal with and it transmutes into toxic thoughts and behaviour, or that they came from an environment that resulted in them ‘hardening up’ to the point that they lost their ability to empathise of lost part of their humanity – it has nothing to do with you.
I think one of the biggest things I’ve learned in my life is to really ignore everything and just focus on what you want with conscious effort and strong intent. Ignore the naysayers and the noise – they will realize their own shortcomings in due time. You answer only to yourself. Allow me to share on of my favourite quotes:
“All human experience proves over and over again, that any success which comes through meanness, trickery, fraud and dishonour, is but emptiness and will only be a torment to its possessor.” – Frederick Douglass
Everything Is Interlinked And ConnectedThis way of thought of mine is, of course, influenced by Buddhist teachings which played a huge role in my life as I was growing up. If you’re wondering what this interlinking of phenomena means – just think of it as a positive way of framing things and making sense of what goes on in your life. Buddhists just called it ‘karma’ or cause-and-effect. Steve Jobs also once spoke connecting the dots backwards and how everything leads to where you are now. Should that be true, doesn’t that notion make it even more important to think and channel our energies the right way?
For example, many people attribute their success to a tough childhood because it taught them grit and preserverance. A difficult period you’re going through now may prove to be one of the biggest blessings in your life, just that you may not feel that way now. Everything that has happened in the past has led you to where you are now, so imagine the power and importance of every decision we make and every thought that we have.
From a metaphysics perspective, if I were to talk about this in relation to a 八字 chart, someone will have an upturn in their luck and enter into a good 大运 only because they have undergone ‘training’ in previous 大运。This is the law of nature and a pre-requisite for abundance and a prosperous life, so do not see challenges and difficult periods as a bad thing.
Personally, I believe everything happens for a reason, but I also believe in balance and practical wisdom which I’ll explain in my next point.
‘Balance’ Is Key
This concept of balance has been explored by many philosophers in ancient times. Aristotle first argued that virtue is the golden mean between two vices. Courage, when taken to an extreme becomes rashness; taken to the other extreme it becomes cowardice. A balanced person with a balanced notion of courage becomes prudent. I was browsing through my Facebook timeline and stumbled upon an old article a friend shared that describes what I’m trying to convey pretty well.
“Sure, a trait can backfire,” Witter said. “Too much grit, like Okonkwo, you start to lose your ability to have empathy for other people. If you’re so gritty that you don’t understand why everyone’s complaining about how hard things are, because nothing’s hard for you, because you’re Mr. Grit, then you’re going to have a hard time being kind. Even love — being too loving might make you the kind of person who can get played.” There was a ripple of knowing laughter from the students. “So, yes, character is something you have to be careful about. Character strengths can become character weaknesses.
The concept of balance appears in ancient Chinese philosophy as well. The saying goes 物极必反, and when it 反s you better pray it’s a positive 反, but I can say from experience that most of the time it is not. You can see ‘balance’ everywhere, even in nature where 八字 analysis draws it interpretations from. Too much Fire and Metal melts before it can be forged into a valuable too or ornament; too much Wood and the Fire gets extinguished before can provide warmth; too much Water and Wood ends up being driftwood; too much Earth and Water becomes inaccessible and cannot nourish life. In 八字 we call this 中和为贵’ and in Buddhism, we call this the Middle Path. What I’m trying to say is that, and this is something that I really believe in as a practitioner, whatever I mentioned above, or whatever that it is that you’ve read on other mediums, always consider the flip side and the alternative, opposing view. I believe the best decisions are made and the best kind of lives are lived when it comes from a position of ‘balance’. Nothing good comes out of venturing into the extreme.
All these being said. I do not wish for anyone to think that I’ve got it all figured out nor do I wish for anyone to feel like I’m putting myself on a pedestal. I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again – I’m just like everyone else with my own flaws, just that I happened to have an interest in metaphysics and ended up developing this peculiar set of skills which benefits from understanding what people go through in their lives. Your impression of me is but only one side of me, set in a professional setting with me as a metaphysics practitioner and consultant – so please understand that I am just like you, fighting my battles and wanting to be happy. I still have my fears even when I’m supposed to be able to see into the future. At the end of the day, I speak and write the way I do because I feel that there is beauty in communication and expressing what one truly feels in a positive and constructive manner, and I hope that by reading my entries, it speaks to that small voice in everyone that would give them the courage and strength to overcome whatever it is their facing, or find a deeper connection with the people around them. I am, in many ways, still finding my way around things. It’s only towards the end of 2016 that I felt that my life has some meaning and had something for me to work towards and look forward to.
There are still so many things I wish to express, but words can only do so much for now. As I step into 2017 with a renewed spirit, I can’t tell you all, again, how grateful I am for your support. I never expected this consultation sideline of mine to take off so well and people to have so much trust in me to do consultations online. I promise everyone I will always do my best in my analysis and consultations.
As we kick-off 2017, I really wish everyone health and happiness. I know life isn’t a bed of roses, but don’t give up and 加油! Take care of your healths, keep fighting and tell yourself to be happy because you deserve it. We’re all going through the same things in life so let’s try to help each other a bit more. I will be keeping everyone in my prayers and I wishing that 2017 will be amazing for everyone!
-Sean
